Giving It A Go…
Yesterday was my company’s holiday celebration. We did a museum tour in downtown Phoenix, starting at Phoenix Art Museum, then to the Lisa Sette Gallery and finally the Bentley Gallery. We saw some amazing art pieces, got background stories on the artists as well as the series displayed. The art was beautiful, heartbreaking, inspiring and perfect for our group. After the third and final museum, we had a reservation at Palma, in a little cabana on their patio, where we had drinks and sushi and laughed at all the stories we shared. We walked next door to Cham Pang Lanes, hoping to play some duckpin bowling, but ended up just having one last round of drinks and laughs to end our day. Easily the best Studio V holiday soiree we’ve had to date.
At our last stop, I wanted to take a photo of the group (behind the camera, that is)…after being shot down on being the photographer, I posted up at the end of the table for the group pic. Everyone looked so beautiful and vibrant and the surroundings were so festive! When my eyes landed on myself in the picture, however, I wanted to cry. I felt pretty cute all day, wore the jeans that make my booty look good (hey girrrrl), and even put on eye makeup which is a rarity for me. This group photo did nothing to reflect the way I felt about myself when I walked out the door that morning. My face was blown out and my loose sweater just made me look like Large Marge (RIP). So, what did I do? I had salty snacks for dinner and felt sorry for myself and the way I looked in that damn photo.
Don’t get it twisted, this is not a “woe is me” post. After I let myself wallow in my pity last night, I woke up and decided that today is my day one. It’s December 15th and I have exactly six weeks until my birthday trip to visit my bestie in Omaha. More than that, it’s my day one of really trying to go alcohol-free for good. I was already planning on doing Dry January, but what’s an extra two weeks, right? Sober October was a mild fail, although I do think it’s changed my habits for the better. I’ve still had a few nights of going overboard, but not to the extent I’d gone before (losing keys, doling out apologies, you know the usual), so I’d say being sober curious has started to sink in more and more. I’m not perfect and neither is my journey (that sounds like a tag line for an informercial).
I am doubling down on this day one and taking these next six weeks to change my diet and exercise habits as well. I have my Amazon cart stacked with a foldable exercise bike, a mini stepper, some light weights and a rack to hold it all in a neat corner in my spare room. My home gym (I use the term loosely) will be complete and I will force myself to get comfortable with working out at home. I still have my box gym contract through April 2023 and I took advantage of my old gym BODI’s black Friday sale and bought a 20-class pack, so I will have those options as well. As far as “diet” goes, my plan is to just take it back to basics and shop the perimeter of the store: lean meats/proteins, fresh produce and healthy snacks like hummus and veggies, protein bento box, etc. I’m not into doing any extreme fad diets, as I want something far more sustainable, so I’m going back to tracking meals (mostly for protein intake) and not overeating (or over-snacking, if that’s a thing).
Let’s just say that, at this point, I’m sick of my own shit AGAIN, but this time I want to stay committed to doing something about it. So here goes…let’s see what we got.
UPDATE: I had a holiday gathering the Sunday after I wrote this post…that turned into a full-on Sunday Funday and I went way overboard and was hurting almost all the next day, regretting not having enough self-control to just not keep the party going. Although these nights are happening fewer and further between, it’s still too much. I’m too much…and I’m so ready to be done. I’m listening to Euphoric by Karolina Rzadkowolska on Audible and it is an eye-opener FOR SURE. I’m so looking forward to starting her 8-week program to go alcohol-free for good. Today is Thursday 12/22 and I have a work event today and a friend’s birthday tomorrow, so I will likely partake in the toasting with a drink. However, I know I won’t drink over the holiday weekend, so I will likely start the program next week. Wish me luck.
